


In Which They Argue On Who Tops

by parssseltongue



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Drabble, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-13
Updated: 2013-01-13
Packaged: 2017-11-25 07:46:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/636683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parssseltongue/pseuds/parssseltongue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Shut up. I at least have two inches over you.” </p>
<p>“But not in the area where it matters most.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Which They Argue On Who Tops

“I’m _older_.”

“I’m manlier.”

“That’s my line. It even made live television.”

“Doesn’t make it true, just look at your face—I’m also taller than you.”

“Nonsense. We’re practically the same height.”

“Shut up. I at least have two inches over you.”

“But not in the area where it matters most.”

“That’s it. I’m getting a ruler.”

“Fine. But you’re clingy, that practically reeks of girlish behavior. That means you bottom.”

“You’re more possessive. You look for me everywhere like a lost puppy. That means I _top_.”

“Well, I’m not the one who glares at people just because they’ve touched you; which reminds me, stop scaring Min Seok.”

“He deserved it.”

“You gave him a spanking!”

“It’s not my fault he’s so vanilla.”

“What about when you handcuffed Yifan to Baek Hyun’s bed then? He’s forever traumatized.”

“ _ONLY_ because he found Chan Yeol riding Yifan _ON_ his bed, and then, he joined in anyways. I hardly call that traumatizing.”

“And when you replaced Yixing’s music with pornographic sounds when he tried to present his song to the higher ups?”

“He was hugging you. I’m just protecting your virtue like any alpha male.”

"He cried for weeks that he even won Zitao's title of Crybaby."

"He. Was. Touching. You. I don't like it when people touch what's mine."

"Pot kettle black. Who's the possessive one now? Argument's closed since this is called ‘Se Hun’s Definitely Bottoming.’”

“Discussion hasn't ended because you're wrong. This is called ‘Lu Han’s STILL Bottoming ‘Cause He Sucks Worse than Se Hun in Everything.’”

“Name one thing. Just one where you’re better than me.”

“Rapping.”

“Your lisp gets in the way.”

“Sing—”

“Please. Don’t even go there. You wail like a pregnant whale when you do. I’ve sang in all of EXO-M’s songs and featured in other singles.”

“Dancing then!”

“At least I can control my face so I don’t look like I need to shit all the time. Besides, who starred in MAXSTEP, THE dancing unit of SM?”

“Fans!”

“…”

“I definitely have more fans than you.”

“…”

“I so do!”

“I’m not even going to comment on that. Can we just have sex now?”

“Thought you’d never ask. This means I win though, right?”

.

.

.

_“Maybe next time.”_

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: These are my own words, any similarities, any likeness to other works are purely coincidental. 
> 
> As for EXO, I am not SME and unfortunately do not own them and I'm merely using these boys for my writing pleasure. 
> 
> Distribution of any kind is prohibited without the written consent of HMB.


End file.
